You should congratulate yourself on confronting your previous problems
. However, new problems have arisen, and these cause you more anxiety.
For you, deviantART has now acquired not just the status of an opiate, but of a religion (which are only the same thing if you believe Karl Marx) - you regard deviantART as a monolithic, abstract entity which claims to love you and which is prepared to punish you - by way of suspending or even permanently banning your account - if you should do anything which displeases it. As such, you feel guilty for acknowledging that you have new problems; but you can't ignore the fact that overcoming the old ones wasn't enough.
But you really don't have to feel guilty. deviantART's love conquers all: it shall be your salvation. And salvation can be achieved by joining groups which indulge your infatuation with Japanese animations.
Of course, if you're a deviantBLASPHEMER (one who prefers Facebook, Twitter, or Delicious.com to deviantART), then much of the above won't make much sense to you. But whether it does or not, know that nobody wishes for you to deactivate your account.
That said, let's consider your new problems.
As a n00b, you did an e-Columbus and navigated your way through deviantART's immense expanse. And one of the first things you did was join as many groups as you could - just for the hell of it. Well, actually, you did
want to make a few friends who shared your interests, and of course you wanted to attain the golden llama; how fabulous it is, by the way, that you're so much more closer to llama Nirvana!
But because you joined so many groups, the assault on your message centre is amazing. You never imagined that you would leave your computer for three minutes for a bathroom break, only to return and find that you've received a hundred and ten new notifications.
To some extent, you brought your troubles on yourself; you could see, even through the haze of admiration that descended upon you whilst ogling fan-arts of Hetalia
, that it probably wasn't the best idea to join so many groups. And yet you're not entirely to blame: you received so many invitations from your deviantFRIENDS to join deviantGROUPS that you felt deviantPRESSURED into deviantJOINING them at the risk of offending their deviantFEELINGS. (By the way, deviantART's strange typography has encroached on your own to such a degree that you now use it liberally, even to refer to things that have nothing to do with deviantART whatsoEVER.)
So, now you have a decision to make: do you hide all the activity from these groups, or do you unjoin them? The dilemma is as follows: if you hide the activity from the groups, then there's no point being a member of them, unless you intend for your membership to be a sign of support; but how can you support something if you're no longer aware of what it does? And if you unjoin the groups, then your deviantGROUPBETRAYAL
(now you're just taking liberties with the typography) will appear in the group's Log, and your profile page might be visited and spammed by angry group administrators demanding to know why you left - actually, demanding to know why you joined
, if all you was going to do was leave - and what was so wrong with a group that flooded your message centre with more notifications than everything else on your deviantWATCH list combined.
And you face a similar dilemma regarding all those people you so eagerly deviantWATCHED on joining the site. Some haven't logged in for weeks on end, whereas others never log out
for weeks on end; and of those who are still here, some post journals or art once in a blue moon, and others post them so often that you sarcastically wonder whether the underactive deviants should outsource to the overactive ones.
Again, tough break.
You can't possibly hope to follow these deviants' activities, since too much overwhelms you and too little doesn't register on your radar. If you hide the activity of the overactive deviants, then there's no longer any point in watching them at all; and there's no point in watching the underactive deviants, either. But to remove these deviants from your deviantWATCH would be a betrayal, you think, especially if these deviants happen to watch you
as well, or even watched you first
. You don't want to ignite deviantDRAMA, and you don't want to pretend that you're fine with this state of affairs when you're not.
In the end, you decide to remove just a couple of people from your deviantWATCH; you compare it with sticking your toe in the sea to see how warm, or how cold, it is. And it's a comfort to you to know that you can always block these individuals if they start demanding unpleasant answers from you.
And now you have high-falutin' ideas of gaining seniority, and even of joining the administration. You've seen that senior members are well-loved and well-respected. And as for the administration, you've noticed that the members with hearts and the deviantART logo next to their screen names get free lifetime premium memberships, and you
want one as well! (You blush when you remember the time you asked the much-beloved administrator farand
how much money he spent on his swanky deal. Do you think he
had any high-falutin' ideas, by the way?)
In the end, you decide to remove everyone from your deviantWATCH and watch solely the hearts and the dA people in an attempt to penetrate their inner circle. You remember thinking, once upon a time, that you have no right to be a snob, but the thought of procuring a lifetime premium membership puts an end to all of that. At the moment it's too early to tell if your dream will come true; but farand
wishes you the best.
Finally, there's the problem of your gallery. All that artwork you uploaded on first joining is, quite frankly, an embarrassment to you; it doesn't 'fit' with your newer, better stuff. You can't bring yourself to delete it, so you'd like to put it into storage, where you know it would never see the light of day again. And yet, you want to keep displaying it - for historical reasons. What are you going to do?